Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Here I Go Again On My own~

Im at I.U. Med center again... Surgery is packed and Im being worked in... I am starving! Working out and drinking water, training for the Breast Cancer 5K... My body has been getting used to eating 5 times a day. Three meals and 2 snacks! I did have to WAIT THREE whole hours for my room to get ready... So I trekked to Riley and had McDonald's.....The salad was YUMMMOOO!!!!
I wont go into the Gorey details but my implant from breast reconstruction is trying to make an appearance on the outside of my body! Totally not a good thing.,, I am UNSURE what I will wake up to? Will I loose the implant and have heal for 6 months to a year or will surgeon save it, or replace it??? God only knows! I just know this is a very hard time... Cancer SUCKS... and so does putting the pieces of your body back together! My heart hurts, my head hurts from crying and stress, and the UNKNOWN! I was supposed to be done with everything on the 22ND of OCT. But now, I don't know if I will be "biggy small" and have to start all over.... I am just speechless now... just thinking of what the results will be when I awake! I know I will be reaching to feel if "it" is still there... and cry if its not! I'm just tired, this has been such a LONG YEAR!